My yellow dress always gets me laid.

I couldn’t help but laugh at the man wrapped in only a white towel glaring at me in my entryway.  Apparently, Downstairs Neighbor, upon being rushed out of my apartment because I was about to get the shit fucked out of me, had hidden behind the corner and when The Neighbor had single-mindedly tried to […]


Begins: Nov 30th, 2011 I date men I could have babysitted | I am fucking my neighbor | I fuck and laugh and cry | I’m freaking out | I accidentally take screen shots | I suck at Scrabble, but rock at sobbing | I’m beautiful in firelight | There’s something wrong with me | […]

I still love him.

It’s happening again. That lurch in my chest, that belly ache.  The wild sense of fear and loneliness has somehow returned in flashes here and there.  I can’t decipher if it’s because of the year I’ve had with him or because my life has primed me for fear of loss. The funny thing is loss […]

I tripped and fell on his cock and then he called me “Sunshine.”

Sunday morning I lay in a strange bed, sunlight streaming in around us. A man lay curled up behind me, his cock buried deep inside of me, my buttocks pushed softly into his thighs. Our breathing was soft and deep. I closed my eyes and he pulled me back into him with a heavy arm. […]

I need advice about my ex-lover.

Internet Boyfriend, I need you! This will be short. I’m in my yellow dress and I’m trying to rest up before my first date with the Law Student. Here’s my question: If I decide to invite him back to my place to hang out, should I give The Neighbor a heads up? A, “Hey, I’m […]

I counted freckles.

The older I get, the more obvious it becomes that life is not black and white.  It’s not a straight path, though all lead to the same end.  The Neighbor and I made love again last night.  Or maybe we fucked.  Our groans and kisses braided together with our breath and sweat, our hands rough […]

I go on first dates with a light heart.

He called and asked if I was free. Turns out the hydrocodone had just kicked in and I had no plans. He’s sweet and kind, but may be too nervous for me. He’s smitten. My curse. Meanwhile, two other men want to meet me out tonight. Let’s see how I juggle them all. And, the […]

I made love.

“I hope we didn’t just make a mistake,” he said as I laid in his embrace. “Shh,” I answered.  “Don’t think about that right now.  I’m trying to enjoy the afterglow.” I smiled into his chest and squeezed him. He chuckled, but then was serious. “But what if I just did something really shitty?” his voice […]

It’s time to be honest.

I haven’t been myself lately.  I’m not being real or honest.  I’m terrified of both. The message I learned growing up is if I were a real and honest little girl about how I felt, then I would be confronted and told I was wrong.  My pain and upset wasn’t real, said my mother, she […]

I survived a small town and lived to tell about it.

If it weren’t for The Neighbor and his shenanigans a year and a half ago I never would have met Marian Green (or Noodle, as I like to call her). It was the night that TN brought home a date when he had told me he couldn’t come over because he had to work late. […]