My dear friend, Jayne, just posted the following. I am verklempt:
I wrote this from my own experience but
I dedicate this to you Hy, a fellow artist of the grandest colors.
I painted him well
A Bruegel or a Van Eyk
Such a fine and clever forgery
to sandbag my love like a dike
A barricade, in essence
Such a lovely man as a front
How ideal my set up was
How beguiling was the hunt!
You were limited from the start
Only now can I see the flaw
I lessened, I padded, I believed
Your benefits were more than what you are
This is NOT to downplay your worth
a goldmine I would never give back
It’s that now I can see clearer
The desires in which I lack
I was so engrossed in the process
We travelled the realm of sublime
Your body and soul exquisitely matched
at a level intertwined with mine
But, the facet of love within me
that matched you – as I still wanted more
has limits, as I, in succumbing
which tells me, I need to explore
“Eyes Up!” for the prize of my heart
Who am I to settle for seconds?
The lesson: Pain is a call I must hear
” There IS a truer love that beckons”
~ by jayne ayres on July 11, 2012.