The spark is fading, but I’m not alarmed.

Hy early morning
It’s been a while since I took one of these.

The Neighbor and I have been very loving and close, but have had little to no action this week.  I fondle his balls and get him hard, he squeezes my tits, motorboats me while we make dinner — we touch and bounce and caress — but never fully land on one another.

I’m in that weird safe place that inevitably happens to everyone to one degree or another: the spark is fading.  There’s no danger left between us.  He’s mine.

Nearly every morning I wake him up at 8 am at his place.  I’m either up due to the cat or from taking Peyton to school.  I quietly let myself in and creep back to his room.  His king-sized mattress is on the floor inside his bed frame and I laugh every time I see it.  He’ll be wound up in blankets completely passed out.  Then I peel off my clothes and slip inside the bubble with him, press my cold body against his flaming hot skin.  But that’s all.

There are no blowjobs, no early-morning moaning.  He’s inevitably much too tired and I don’t care to make it happen.  I’m content to let the ebb just be.

There’s a very small voice in the back of my head that is worried, but I’m trying to keep her quiet and enjoy what I have instead.   I’m going to keep my eye on it, unpack its real meaning, ask good questions like, Why does my desire for him go down the safer I feel?

I know that successful erotic couples keep a healthy emotional distance from one another and perhaps he and I have gotten a bit too close.  Maybe we need to renegotiate the boundaries a little, create more mystery and positive tension.  Maybe we need more kink — we’ve been awfully vanilla for months and months now.

I should tie his white ass up and beat it until it’s a bright, cherry red and he’s writhing and begging and panting for release.

Or maybe I’ll just let the ebb do its thing and not worry about it too much and stick to taking pictures for my horny Internet Boyfriend.

Hy shows her tits in the early morning
Well, hello there.




A 40-something single mother who writes honestly about sex, body image, D/s, relationships, her nervous tics, and how much she loves to fucking fuck. She also likes to show you her tits.

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18 thoughts on “The spark is fading, but I’m not alarmed.
  1. This internet boyfriend of yours is very horny indeed…your pictures are wonderful as always.

    I so very much wish that you figure this out, not just because I want great things for you. But also because it turned out in my marriage I couldn’t do it, and I very desperately do not want a repeat. I have faith in you, Hy – if anyone can do it, you can.

    Ann St. Vincent recently posted…When getting no answer is an answer unto itselfMy Profile

  2. I love reading about you and TN, the way you fit together seems to work so well, I don’t think you have anything to worry about inside his bubble, you’re right to tell that voice to hush x
    Bigbuttbbw recently posted…ExhaustedMy Profile

  3. This is, of course, a huge conundrum, isn’t it. It’s so wonderful to be so “safe” with each other (remember 2 years ago?!!), yet therein lies the danger. Complacency, taking each other for granted, no need to “try” anymore. I do think you need to make the effort and occasionally spice up your evening meal. Fatigue from the daily grind of life is a huge relationship killer.


  4. Loving your beautifully sexy pics Hy. I feel this post is also very indicative of where you guys are at the moment, safe is good, though as another so eloquently put it, complacency is a killer. I’m sure you’ll both be able to keep adding a dash of spice, whoop that ass of TN’s cherry red occasionally! ;)

  5. Been married with my first honey for 35+ years, and with our second for five, and the THR3E of us still have that spark! Drifting off to sweet love making at night, waking to oral in the mornings, and public affection/groping is commonplace…and so awesome! Our relationship is ahhh-mazing all on its own, and the sex is simply wonderful icing on our cake, however when circumstances cause us to go a day or (egad!) two without, it feels like forever! It just works, and oh-so-good!
    Bottom line: Don’t accept the fade…work to keep that spark…makes life so much more ELECTRIC!

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