I believe I can fly.

Don’t look.

This long gaze and wide view of me makes me tremble.  There are no slights of hand here, no cut of a shadow or kiss of a sunbeam to contour my shape.  I feel more exposed in this open frame than in all of my thousands of arm’s length, close-up photos.  You can actually see me.

I believe that confidence is a mix of a magic feather and willing audience.  They want to see me fly and so I fly.  High and light and beautiful above them, gripping my feather tight because it can’t possibly be real, this unconditional appreciation and love.

When I was 10 my little heart was ground to a pulp by a silly boy and a group of heckling friends.  They didn’t believe in me except my gullibility.  I was detestable, an easy target.  That wasn’t the thing that broke me, but it was by far the most memorable – and earliest – instance when I felt unacceptable.

Growing up in this world that presents a very narrow path to society’s acceptance – skinny, young, pouty lips, clear skin, big tits, shiny hair, fun, funny, pretty, easy, cool, sweet, and and and – I suffered like most of us do.  I wasn’t special in that narrative.  I hated everything about my body.  My hair color, my ass, my little breasts.  I never wanted to be what I was.

Then I began to find my audience as I grew older.  No one was kicking me out of bed.  I may not have been stopping traffic, but I seemed to be holding my own.  Boys in bars and men online and folks online, people whose acceptance of me was never narrow treated me like I was a desirable, beautiful woman.

It took a while – 36 years to be exact – but I finally discovered the equation to feel 7 feet tall: a little cleavage and a controlled image plus an approving audience equals a performance that even I could believe in.  It was as if I believed in them believing in me which helped me believe in myself.  I truly am not an island: I need you all.

I worry sometimes about the passage of time and my inevitable move away from the narrow definition of attractiveness and this self-esteem equation but perhaps by then I will have shifted things around.  Less audience, more just me.  I’ve seen enough little old ladies with white chin hairs like dorsal fins above the water’s surface to know that it could happen.

For now it looks like something like this: Some Hy x my mood + some audience approval = a confident, relaxed Hy.  My mood is the variable that affects the need for audience approval.  For example, had I not gotten laid February 1st after taking a months worth of long-view photos for this project I may have taken a hit right in the gut and stayed in bed for the weekend periodically wondering how anyone can stand being around me.

But I didn’t have to worry about that because my smoke and mirrors worked in person, too, and I got to rub my hands all over his chiseled abs even as my soft thighs spread down around on either side of hips.  My act so seamless and sublime that he didn’t now he was really with a dumpy middle-aged woman.  He truly thought he was with a voluptuous goddess that night.  And so did I.  Because I am.

February Photofest

Friday, January 11th, is Boobday!

Hy tits banner in black and white v neck t shirt

I wrote my submission for the Eroticon anthology on the 2nd and though no one has seen it, it felt like I wrote – I mean, I did it’s just that y’all didn’t get to see it. And if isn’t accepted I’ll post it here and have a bit of a freebie post.

My week has been childless and quiet.  No dates – I’m on a Man Cleanse for January which I’ll write about more another day – and I’m mostly on a booze cleanse too (only socially, not alone — although I did drink wine at home tonight on my own and enjoyed every second of it.  In other words, I’ve been spending a lot of time just being with myself and laying really low.

Full disclosure: I am chatting a little with some fellas here an there – My Irishman and a couple of old friends – but any time I meet a new man online and he asks me out I say, “Sorry, I’m not free until February.”

My phone is quiet, my mind is quiet, my vag is very very quiet.  Good times, y’all.

I chose this pic this week because despite being at my heaviest ever and without any lover in my life I still feel beautiful and sex.  It wasn’t always like that.  I used to feel lost in a black void when I wasn’t getting fucked.  I feel like I’ve rounded some kind of self-esteem corner.  It’s rather nice.

xx

Hy

 

Full Boobday Guidelines here.

One of two ways to participate:

1) either submit a pic to me via email (hyacinth.jones@hotmail.com) OR

2) submit a link below to your own blog post for Boobday.

Also, just as a reminder:

If you send me a pic, be sure to tell me if you want to be anonymous or not and what your pseudonym is (if you have one or I gave you one)

Tell me why you chose the photo you sent

And don’t forget to comment on everyone’s posts! This is all about spreading the love!

 

My tits:

A good pose and lighting can’t be underestimated.

 

NOT my tits:

Miss B’s lovely warm and pink first sharing.
I have become a larger woman as I have aged, yet would not want the smaller breasts I had when younger.  My boyfriend enjoys buying me very sexy bras and my wearing them under a very sheer blouse/top when we go out.  He wants the world to see my breasts and I am unashamed and proud to do so.  Breasts are a beautiful body part to be celebrated.

::

I love the black and white and the shadows of SMN’s pic.

Hello winter sweaters and underboob.

::

 

 

 

 


Friday, January 4th, is Boobday!

Hy tits banner in black and white v neck t shirt

My little Boobday break did me good.  It was nice to not worry about it over the insane holidays.  I felt more worn down after Christmas than I do after a week of work!  I’ve gotta figure that out…

Anyway, I’m back at it and I didn’t even let you guys know.  I’m posting Sandy’s 12/14 Boobday pic (thanks, Sandy!).

I’m ready for 2019 (even though I’m not a fan of the number itself – I’m weird about prime numbers) and looking forward to an exciting and better year all around.

I picked this photo of me because that morning I was struck by how damn soft I felt.  I know I feel myself every day, but that morning it caught my attention and I imagined how I must feel to someone else.  Soft, warm, squishy.

Here’s to being back on track with Boobday!!  See y’all next week!!

xx

Hy

 

Full Boobday Guidelines here.

One of two ways to participate:

1) either submit a pic to me via email (hyacinth.jones@hotmail.com) OR

2) submit a link below to your own blog post for Boobday.

Also, just as a reminder:

If you send me a pic, be sure to tell me if you want to be anonymous or not and what your pseudonym is (if you have one or I gave you one)

Tell me why you chose the photo you sent

And don’t forget to comment on everyone’s posts! This is all about spreading the love!

 

My tits:

Soffffft.

NOT my tits:

Minty Sandy.


Friday, November 23rd, is Boobday!

Hy tits banner in black and white v neck t shirt

It was Thanksgiving in the US yesterday and it’s become the time of year when reflection is served along side the turkey.

I’m currently sitting on a couch about 3 hours from home with dogs strewn everywhere, at my hip, my feet and on the other couch.  Peyton and my friend of 20+ years are watching some college football game and idly chatting.  I’m fighting extreme fatigue – turkey overdose, bad sleep, and too much wine the past two nights.  I can’t decide whether or not to stay overnight again or just jump back on the road.

I’m feeling pretty grateful for my life right now.  Despite my ever present back pain, I believe I’m relatively healthy *knock on wood* and I am feeling less and less lonely as the weeks and months go by.  The Neighbor’s return into my life has fortified the growth I’ve experienced in the year that he was away.  I feel 10 feet tall and unstoppable and suddenly more hopeful than ever for the coming days.  I overwhelming feel like I got this.

Anyway, sorry for the late posting, all my beautiful friends in the UK and Europe.  I nearly forgot all about it so I’m feeling pretty good that there’s a post at all!

To my fellow Americans, I hope you had a beautiful day with the people you love the most yesterday!

Love to you all.

xx

Hy

Full Boobday Guidelines here.

One of two ways to participate:

1) either submit a pic to me via email (hyacinth.jones@hotmail.com) OR

2) submit a link below to your own blog post for Boobday.

Also, just as a reminder:

If you send me a pic, be sure to tell me if you want to be anonymous or not and what your pseudonym is (if you have one or I gave you one)

Tell me why you chose the photo you sent

And don’t forget to comment on everyone’s posts! This is all about spreading the love!

 

My tits:

Blue blooded.

NOT my tits:

Grateful for Sandy.

 

 

 


Friday, November 16th, is Boobday!

Hy tits banner in black and white v neck t shirt

 

Late start to a lazy Friday.  I’m still processing The Neighbor being in my life again, angry every time I take the dog out to shit.  Seriously.

And if you don’t know why I’m upset, then I suggest just digging into all the posts about him.  That is if you have a week of your life you want to lose lol.  I’ve done my best to impart my feelings and provide links for the backstory, but I know that some of you are new here.

But I’m ok.  I’ll be ok.  Fuck it.

Although, I could do without him running around my dreams the past week.  That shit sucks.

This week’s pic of me I chose because I look so damn juicy.  My attitude about my body has changed drastically in the last several months and I feel so powerful, strong, and sexy.  It’s a great place to be.

Sandy gave me an update and she’s doing great.  I also asked if her surgery was a full hysterectomy since I couldn’t remember.

“Was only ovaries and tubes. There was extensive scar tissue which was unexpected so recovery has been slow. Only in the past 2 weeks has that road burn feeling started to subside. Still don’t have clearance to get back to my normal routine but I’ve been working one on one with one of my CrossFit coaches to work around my limitations.

I’m not going to decide on the breast stuff until some time next year. I’ll go through a few rounds of mammos and MRIs and see if anything shows up to cause concern. There’s so much controversy surrounding implants that I want to research it further. I’ve heard using your own body fat is a possible option.

If anyone is interested, prior to surgery I started BioTE hormone replacement (pellet insertion) and I have not suffered any menopausal symptoms. My sex life has been great too. (I’m actually sitting at the Dr now waiting for my quarterly insertion).”

I love you all and hope your Friday is great!

xx

Hy

 

Full Boobday Guidelines here.

One of two ways to participate:

1) either submit a pic to me via email (hyacinth.jones@hotmail.com) OR

2) submit a link below to your own blog post for Boobday.

Also, just as a reminder:

If you send me a pic, be sure to tell me if you want to be anonymous or not and what your pseudonym is (if you have one or I gave you one)

Tell me why you chose the photo you sent

And don’t forget to comment on everyone’s posts! This is all about spreading the love!

 

My tits:

NOT my tits:

Sandy knows what’s up.

Too cold to take out more than one

 


Friday, November 9th, is Boobday!

Hy tits banner in black and white v neck t shirt

Today has been a day to process the new shift in my world and I’m fucking exhausted.  I haven’t cried that hard in therapy probably since the initial breakup forever ago, and I have a ways to go still before this is completely organized in me.  I feel so powerless and unsafe.

I have a short term plan – sort of, mostly, kind of – and already had a long term one before this hit me in the face: I’d decided to leave this apartment a year from now to move closer to Peyton’s school.  So one year is all I have to endure of this.  I can do that.

I hope everyone has a fantastic Friday and thank you for all your support, love and feedback.  I am forever grateful for all of it.

xx

Hy

 

Full Boobday Guidelines here.

One of two ways to participate:

1) either submit a pic to me via email (hyacinth.jones@hotmail.com) OR

2) submit a link below to your own blog post for Boobday.

Also, just as a reminder:

If you send me a pic, be sure to tell me if you want to be anonymous or not and what your pseudonym is (if you have one or I gave you one)

Tell me why you chose the photo you sent

And don’t forget to comment on everyone’s posts! This is all about spreading the love!

 

My tits:

Been really happy with my old body lately and not a damn thing about it has changed.

NOT my tits:

I love all of Sandy’s naughty work photos.

Pulling one out at the office 😉

::

Anonymous Aussie shares an intimate moment with us.

In a fit of passion between my lover & I, this pic was snapped & sent in an instant & a flurry of passion. I look back on it & barely recall taking it!

::


Friday, October 12th, is Boobday!

Hy tits banner in black and white v neck t shirt

This week has been wonderful.  Pey is home with me and in my arms and my Whole30 “cleanse” appears to be helping with my pain by reducing some inflammation.  I think I need to face it: I can’t live on bread and cheese and wine.  What a travesty.  But being able to get out of bed without crying out in pain is worth what feels like a sacrifice.

Yesterday the weather cooled off and as it cooled, my spirits lifted.  I cannot stand the oppressive heat here.  It suffocates me and I feel flattened, trapped.  The first whiff of fall and I am floating along in the street.  It makes my fantasies of moving to England spike and I open my OKC location parameters to the entire world.

Happy Boobday!!

Love you all.

xx,

Hy

 

Not sure what the little bruises are except maybe from my fat cat making biscuits on me.

Panicked that he was late returning to work, Peter got dressed so quickly he left his underwear behind this afternoon.  His loss, my gain!

NOT my tits:

Sandy resplendent.

Just one.


Friday, September 21st, is Boobday!

Hy tits banner in black and white v neck t shirt

 

Peter has filled me up with his lovely jizz and I’m off to a birthday dinner date with the gay(ish) couple.  They’re making me dinner so it leads me to believe they want to consummate our relationship tonight, but I am more than satisfied after an hour of sweaty, tear-infused fucking with Peter.  Plus, JIZZ.

I like to languish in the smells and filth of sex, so I won’t be showering.  I will be going as is and making some kind of excuse later as to why I don’t want to fool around – if it comes to that.  Plus, I’m not that attracted to the younger one…

Anyway, Happy Almost Autumn!  And I’ll hopefully be writing more this weekend.

(Maybe I should make an Every Dam Day in _____ commitment because that was fun and surprisingly easy.)

Oh, and HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SANDY!!

Love you all.

xx

Hy

[Ed. Note:: I got home after 1 am and attempted to polish this post off, but promptly fell asleep mid-attempt.  I did not consummate my relationship with The Boys because I realized it’s really hard to be turned on by a gay couple.  We discussed it openly and the older one, the “tom cat,” will take point on this and we’ll see where it goes.]

 

Full Boobday Guidelines here.

One of two ways to participate:

1) either submit a pic to me via email (hyacinth.jones@hotmail.com) OR

2) submit a link below to your own blog post for Boobday.

Also, just as a reminder:

If you send me a pic, be sure to tell me if you want to be anonymous or not and what your pseudonym is (if you have one or I gave you one)

Tell me why you chose the photo you sent

And don’t forget to comment on everyone’s posts! This is all about spreading the love!

 

 

My tits:

Sent this to Peter the other night.

 

NOT my tits:

LOLA 092118
A rendition of my dear friend, Lo. Click the pic to buy HH’s book!

::

 

Sandy has dressed up her girl for her birthday!

I hope this isn’t too tacky (uhh…no pun intended lol)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Today is my birthday. The boy toy gave me the largest bouquet of flowers I’ve ever seen, a new health tracking watch, and cum covered boobs.

 


Friday, September 14th, is Boobday!

Hy tits banner in black and white v neck t shirt
My finger is hovering over the click button to buy my plane tickets to London for next year’s Eroticon.  Peter continues to bring a little pocket of joy and play into my week.  The school year is in full swing.  My back pain has lowered to a 5 or 6.  My finances are straightening out.  I’m sleeping well.  I’m thick as fuck.  I’m calm.
I’m headed to the mountains this weekend for a best friend’s wedding.  I can’t wait to feel the chill air on my skin and wrap my arms around my friends.
So far, 43 ain’t half bad.
Love you all as always.
xx,
Hy

Full Boobday Guidelines here.

One of two ways to participate:

1) either submit a pic to me via email (hyacinth.jones@hotmail.com) OR

2) submit a link below to your own blog post for Boobday.

Also, just as a reminder:

If you send me a pic, be sure to tell me if you want to be anonymous or not and what your pseudonym is (if you have one or I gave you one)

Tell me why you chose the photo you sent

And don’t forget to comment on everyone’s posts! This is all about spreading the love!

My tits:

 

I still pop it.

NOT my tits:

Lovely Sandy and her gorgeous jugs.

Took this to try cheering up the boy toy.

 

 


Friday, August 10th, is Boobday!

Hy tits banner in black and white v neck t shirt

I’ve been quiet around here, I know.  Mostly deliberately.  Things aren’t going well between me and Elliot, and while I have no regrets and feel like I have grown exponentially, I haven’t wanted to write about it.

I’ve also been having some hot sex with a very old FWB (he’s the guy I met on Tinder in this post).  Peter is the cure to my ails, a cookie to dip in my black coffee.  He’s sweet, affectionate, giving and thinks I’m the cat’s meow and is absolutely zero maintenance.  He’s helped keep me sane since things with Elliot began to unravel.

August has started out with a real bang for me and I’ve let the writing slip to the way side.  Always writing posts in my head, though.  I wonder how many times I’ve written the words, “I’ll post about it soon/later…”

And this week I remembered to include Sandy’s note.   All the hugs to you, Sandy!

Love you guys,

xx

Hy

 

My tits:

I do have a “pose.”

NOT my tits:

I feel Sandy.

It was suggested to me today to consider voluntary prophylactic mastectomy. Lots on the mind.